For some people, it’s a chore to remember their happiest days.
Happiness is a fleeting feeling; there are not many happy days, but happy days happen. It’s almost a transitional moment; you live a little, and you’re bound to have a happy day.
Sometimes, it’s not even up to you. Your friends can make you happy, your family can surprise you, and the person you’re in a relationship with might do something that makes you burst into laughter, crack a smile, or even expose a giggle.
On the other hand, there’s sadness, and unlike happiness, sadness stays a bit longer.
Being betrayed by a friend you could give your life for, being hurt by someone you love, having high expectations only to be met with a disgusting heartbreak, those kinds of things, they hurt.
Each day you think about it, you feel the pain afresh. It’s easier to remember your first heartbreak than it is to remember love. [ I know, they didn’t try, your god will judge them; wicked people].
It’s easier to remember the feeling of a stolen car than the joy you felt when you bought your first car. It’s just how it is.
I can’t explain why, and if you can, please drop a comment. I’d love to read and learn.
I’ve been thinking, and I have come to the conclusion that just like sadness, failure too loves to overstay its welcome.
Failure stalls. It lingers, it dwells, it will enter your house and ask for remote, it will taste the soup you put on the fire and tell you. ‘Is pepper not too much?’
Failure will keep you in the shadows, unable to speak for fear that the painful memory will be remembered again.
It is a dreaded emotion. Nobody is talking, but you hear voices.
You see their eyes, and you’re scared they remember what you did, what you said, how you looked, where it happened. You’re trapped in the ghost of your past mistakes.
Can I tell you something funny, even though you might not believe it? People no really send you like that o. They are busy thinking about themselves.
‘What will people say’ is the national anthem of mediocre people, and that anxiety you feel that people are judging you from your last mistake is PTSD from the last time you failed [at something].
I won’t stand here and lie to you that people forget; sometimes they don’t. However, I also won’t let you go thinking that just because they didn’t forget, you shouldn’t.
Have I met you before? Do you know me? Can I prophesy?
I want you to close your eyes and think about one person you know who doesn’t have shame. The one who always asks stupid questions in class, the one who laughs with you at their own mistakes, the one who doesn’t remember the insults and filters them out as background noise.
Still keep your eyes closed, don’t interrupt the anointing.
The one who isn’t scared to look like a fool, did anyone come to mind? My best bet, that person will be somebody whose failure doesn’t come with the stigma of shame.
If you take away shame, failure has no power. The problem is that you care too much about what other people think.
Failure is the attendance you sign for attempting something you barely know. Why do you judge yourself so harshly?
Anyone can make a mistake, but those who are wise don’t let their mistakes define them.
Failure is feedback to do better. Think about it…
Help me remember a time you failed. Now, what you did do?
Did you learn from it or feel embarrassed about it? Did you see it as fuel or did you see it as an explosion? Did you forgive yourself enough to heal, or do you still feel ashamed when it’s brought up?
Let me tell you the truth: if you knew better, you would have done better. In case you missed it, let me say it again for the people at the back.
“If you take away shame, failure has no power. The problem is that you care too much about what other people think.”
Screenshot this quote, post it and tag @innysblog
Repeat after me, ‘Na mistake I make, I no kill person.’
You failed at ‘x’, you are not a failure. If you want to be successful, or at least achieve a high percentage of your goals, you need to be audacious.
So the relationship didn’t work out, and the business packed up, so what if ‘it’ failed? See what I did there? It, not you. It’s not your fault [Sometimes, it is sha].
However, don’t let your story be a full stop after you fail. Add a comma, and go write something better.
