When Last Did Someone Ask You, ‘Have You Eaten?’

As a child, you had a favourite toy, plate, spoon, shoe, or piece of clothing [especially that one you loved to wear on Sundays].

As you grew up and understood human connections, you transferred this love from things to people, and gradually, you became willing to share these things with the people you love.

No matter how hard it is to live with people, people will forever be important because we can’t live life on our own. Regardless of who you are, you need somebody else.

The cooker is lit, the ingredients are out, and I’m adorned in my apron. Now, let the cooking begin.

Among the many stories my dad shares about my mom, the funniest is one he recounts whenever the family goes out for drinks.

Before we became the crowd sitting at the table, he recounts a time when he and my mom had gone out for drinks. I was a baby then, and they had left me at home.

He played it cool and tried to get her home, even though he noticed her panicking and repeating the words, “I have something to say.”

When they got home, she immediately came to me and said she had ‘a lot’ to drink and wanted to tell me something important. She said, “In case anything happens to me, I want you to know I love you so much.”

This story is funny for two reasons: one, my mom doesn’t drink a lot, and what she had must have been very laughable; and two, it’s easier to fight a bull with your hands tied behind your back than it is to get my mom to say she loves you.

She’s not a bad person; she’s just a typical African mom. However, that situation jerked my attention to something.

I don’t know what your situation is, but some people only feel loved twice: on their birthdays and probably when they exit this stage called life.

That’s unnecessarily sad.

So, where were we? Childhood, right?

In my opinion, one of the crucial differences between childhood and adulthood is often your reluctance to show any sign of weakness.

In the process of exhibiting self-sufficiency, you’ve killed that part of you.

Assuming you made a list of the things adults have in common—aside from families, jobs, and money [coughs]—we’ll have the fear of old age, insecurities, and painful regrets as similarities.

Hold on to regrets for a moment. Let me parboil your food.

Have you ever asked yourself why regrets hurt so much? I think it’s time you start seeing every day as an opportunity.

Not because tomorrow is never guaranteed [I fought so hard not to add that], but because the next person needs you.

How? I know, hold on. I’m bringing desserts.

You see a lady single and you throw a bant at her. Laughter here and there, she laughs as well, but that was not very mindful; it wasn’t dem…

Likewise, you see a guy who has not yet ‘arrived’, and that becomes the thing you want to make a joke about. It’s friendly banter; he shouldn’t take it personally. But did you for once think of the fact that this person has been thinking about this too?

Kindness isn’t always about extending a helping hand. Sometimes, it’s about sharing encouraging words.

We’re all going through something, but you can make the world better if you don’t keep poking at people’s pain.

Should I bring it down, or should we let it marinate more?

If you’ve been at the receiving end of what I am describing, you can tell it hurts, and if you do this, it’s time you stopped.

You see, the whole point of bringing you to the kitchen was to point this out for you.

We are all guilty of doing hurtful things unconsciously; it’s not anyone’s fault. However, we can all do better.

Not everyone is experimental with food, but care is a meal we must learn to eat. It might not be the tastiest, but it’s highly nutritious.

I didn’t make extra; can you share this food for thought with someone, please?